"Thanks for wiping my butt, Mom"

Tonight at bathtime, as we talked about our plans for the week, I told Cody I'd see him when I got home from work tomorrow. Here's what followed.

CJP: I do not like it when you go to work. I do not want you to go to your office in Washington anymore. Okay?

Me: I know. I don't really like it when I go to work either. But it's one of my jobs. It helps me with my most important job: taking care of you and your sister.

CJP: Do you have other jobs?

Me: Lots of them. Can you guess what some of my jobs are?

CJP: Well, you make me dinner.

Me: Yes. And breakfast and lunch, too.

CJP: And dinner. And, you get the toilet paper when I pee! And, when I poop, you wipe my butt! Mom, that is really helpful to me because it's kind of hard for me to do that. Thank you so much for wiping my butt, Mom.

Me: You're most welcome. It's my pleasure.

CJP: Why is it your pleasure?

Me: Oh, it's just an expression.

CJP: Well, also, you clean the toilets.

Me: That's a true statement. That is also one of my jobs.

CJP: Well, you have to do that because you are an adult. But, when I get to be a big adult person like you, I will help you clean the potties! I will get my very own chemicals, and my own toilet brush. It will be blue. And, I will get my own special cleaner, and I will be your helper! We will clean the potties together! Like best friends!

Me: I can hardly wait. That sounds excellent.

CJP: Well, you also do so many other things that are sweet to me. But I really like watching when you clean the potties. Mom. Can you please lift me out of the bath? I really, really have to pee. Right now. And possibly poop.

Me: It would be my pleasure. Thank you for keeping me posted.

CJP: It was my pleasure.

Seriously, you can't make this stuff up. Also, you wouldn't really want to.