Lessons from LDP

While watching music videos on Saturday, the kids made a gruesome discovery when we put on a semi-recent live performance by Guns 'n' Roses. Slash, their favorite guitarist, wasn't there.

I explained to them that in the '90s, Axl and Slash had had a falling out, which resulted in Slash quitting the band. I then explained that over the years, everyone had quit or been fired from the band except for Axl. They wanted to know why this was. I explained, in highly generic terms (and avoiding any mention of substance abuse) that, more or less, mo' money, mo' problems. I said that Axl turned out to be kind of a bully who didn't listen to the input of his colleagues and who insisted on doing everything his own way. Cody's highly developed sense of justice kicked in. He now hates Axl and says that the revamped lineup of GNR is clearly inferior.

Tonight, Cody wanted to revisit the subject at some length. He wanted to know about the Beatles and I explained it was a similar dynamic. (I did not mention Yoko.) I said that this often happens with bands because typically one member is the driving creative force, which often leads to fracturing of the unit. Here's roughly how it proceeded from there:

Cody: When I'm the leader of a band, I'm going to be the lead singer and the lead guitarist and the songwriter.

JVL: That's great; then you'll be the leader of the group.

Cody: And maybe I'll hire Axl just so I can bully him and fire him so he can see how that feels.

JVL: I suppose you could.

Cody: And I will be a great leader. And I won't bully people.

JVL: That's wonderful. A great leader leads by building consensus. That means that he listens to everyone around them and values their opinions. And then he works to help everyone come to a decision together that they can all agree with. He never just decides on what songs should be in the set list himself or threatens to kick people out of the band. A great leader leads by creating consensus.

Cody [long pause]: I think I'll probably be a medium leader.